Timeline

Today, I got Facebook timeline.  A huge part of me had always wanted to go back to 2009 when things were so tough in life, but of course I never did.  So when I got timeline, the first thing I did was click on 2009.  I wasn't sure how I was going to feel seeing what I posted way back when...

So I started in December 2009.  Wow, what a mix!  I worked my way back and saw my posts of "tired of the lies," "always being put down," "tired and frustrated," "fed up," "never had my life threatened until tonight," "how can he not call to check on his daughter for days... soon it will be weeks, then months, then..." - Who would have truly thought that status update would become true.

WOW!  I went through a lot! 

But what I really got from it was this... I have amazing friends!  No seriously, amazing!  Every post, comment, picture, thought was met with love and compassion, and I feel so blessed.  I remember always saying that Facebook got me through those rough times.  Going back, I'm reminded exactly why I feel that way.  I received comments that were as simple as "I love you," "hang in there," "I'm calling you right now."  Dang, my friends are amazing!  They carried me through those times and I'll never be able to thank them enough.

But now as I look at those comments, I also have a sense of sadness.  I'm sad because I have choosen not to post on Facebook much due to privacy.  I'm sad because so many of those friends I don't talk to much any more because life simply got in the way.  One of them I had a falling out with and we're no longer Facebook friends and I'm sure there are others that were somehow removed along the way for this reason or that.  

I know I'll never be able to repay my friends for being there for me during that dreadful, yet blessing, of a year in 2009.  I love my friends very much and I wish there was more than "Thank You, I Love You" that I could say or do.  I hope they know that I will always appreciate them carrying me, almost literally, for those many many months of hard times.  They helped mold me in to the strong individual I am today.